This blog is pretty depressing. Sorry about that.
So here are my options:
1. Get parts to fix crib.
Down Side:
This may take 2-3 weeks to get the parts in. Since they didn't rush/overnight the recall parts I'm thinking we won't get regular parts any faster. We lose any success we gained with the big boy bed and would have to start over at some point. He may have a fit to be back in a prison type bed.
Up Side:
He's in prison. If it takes an hour to fall asleep at least we know he is in bed and has a chance to nap as opposed to taking his room apart (literally).
2. Put him in full time daycare.
Down Side:
I like staying home with him. This costs more and we don't just have the money. I'd have to go back to work in some capacity to make some extra money. His current part-time daycare doesn't have openings so we either wait list or find a new daycare. I hate to change daycare at this point. I like it and the people and I think Peanut does too. I've been out of work for quite some time. What could I do? Retail? Blah. Plus I'm 5ish months pregnant and who is going to hire that? I won't be able to stay on my feet long and the farther along I get the harder it will be to work. Plus, I want to stay home with baby 2 so it seems stupid to work for a couple months and then quit. Which, by then we still can't really afford full time daycare so he either has to go back to part-time or I have to work at least enough to pay for the full time.
Up Side:
I'm losing my mind and maybe that will stop. Peanut naps at daycare so maybe he'll sleep. Maybe he is done being with mommy so much and this will be good for him.
3. Do nothing
Down Side:
I'm losing my mind.
Up Side:
No increased cost for daycare.
So. Anyone have any brilliant ideas? I could use them. I keep thinking a vacation would be nice, but we'll still have problems when we get back. So spending money to get away seems sort of wasteful. I don't know. There are other issues with this that I don't feel like writing about right now. Suffice it to say a break would be nice, but trouble would be waiting for us on the return.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
Wednesday, January 23, 2008
The Dr. is In
Do all therapists suck? It seems that all the ones I've encountered do. Granted there are millions and I've seen like 4 in the course of my life, but they have all been less than fabulous. This one is supposed to help us with parenting issues. We talked mostly about sleep problems today. I think she thought she was being helpful, but in the end I found it useless. I relate it to having someone tell you to pet a lion by offering him a hot dog first to sooth him. Probably not going to work and do you really want to try it?
I'm in a bad place and I think Husband is too. We could really use a good therapist to talk to. Someone that we can be honest with, that will tell us the cold hard truth. I don't want to hear stories about other families (unless it somehow relates to me). I want to hear what we should be doing. I want to know what we are doing wrong. I want to know how to want to wake up in the morning. I want to know how to get through the day without crying. Anyone know?
To help relieve stress, we're taking turns. I watch Peanut one night and Husband watches him another. While it's nice to get a break, it sucks to never see my Husband until the weekend when neither of us knows what to do.
We went to church. I was amazed lightning didn't hit. It was a far cry from the church I'm used to, but I liked it. Some of the things the Pastor said really felt right. I did feel like I was in the movie "Saved" though. There was a rock band and everyone wore jeans. Anyway, overall I liked it. I just hope we can go and be accepted for us and meet some people and enjoy it. I don't want to be converted to a Jesus freak or anything. I'm not going to give up everything and move to the inner city in the name of the Lord. I think I can help people and feel good right here in pleasant town.
I'm tired. I'm sad. I'm lonely. I really want all that to change.
I'm in a bad place and I think Husband is too. We could really use a good therapist to talk to. Someone that we can be honest with, that will tell us the cold hard truth. I don't want to hear stories about other families (unless it somehow relates to me). I want to hear what we should be doing. I want to know what we are doing wrong. I want to know how to want to wake up in the morning. I want to know how to get through the day without crying. Anyone know?
To help relieve stress, we're taking turns. I watch Peanut one night and Husband watches him another. While it's nice to get a break, it sucks to never see my Husband until the weekend when neither of us knows what to do.
We went to church. I was amazed lightning didn't hit. It was a far cry from the church I'm used to, but I liked it. Some of the things the Pastor said really felt right. I did feel like I was in the movie "Saved" though. There was a rock band and everyone wore jeans. Anyway, overall I liked it. I just hope we can go and be accepted for us and meet some people and enjoy it. I don't want to be converted to a Jesus freak or anything. I'm not going to give up everything and move to the inner city in the name of the Lord. I think I can help people and feel good right here in pleasant town.
I'm tired. I'm sad. I'm lonely. I really want all that to change.
Saturday, January 05, 2008
Day 4 Asleep on the Floor
Nap didn't go well today. I took an hour and a half for him to go to sleep. He only slept about an hour, but woke up fairly happy.
Bedtime went ok but it's 9:30 and I'm not sure he is asleep. I keep finding him on the floor. He takes his blanket, bear and sometimes his pillow and lays on the floor. I've put him back to bed each time though. He hasn't made a peep since 8:14 when I put him in bed, but he has not fallen asleep yet.
This isn't much fun and I'm tired. I figure it takes two weeks to make a habit. We have 10 more days.
Bedtime went ok but it's 9:30 and I'm not sure he is asleep. I keep finding him on the floor. He takes his blanket, bear and sometimes his pillow and lays on the floor. I've put him back to bed each time though. He hasn't made a peep since 8:14 when I put him in bed, but he has not fallen asleep yet.
This isn't much fun and I'm tired. I figure it takes two weeks to make a habit. We have 10 more days.
Thursday, January 03, 2008
Night Night
Tuesday, the boy did not nap in his bed so husband took him for a drive and he slept in the car. Tuesday night I put the boy down for bed. Actually, I never got that far. He was wound up and wiggly while we were reading books. I couldn't get him to calm down to go to bed. He got up and husband came in and sort of took over. I left. Thirty minutes later I went back because husband was done. After another hour or so of putting him back in bed, sitting with him, talking to him and whatnot I decided we needed a new approach. We are the parents. We make the rules. The first rule is you go to bed at bedtime. The second rule is you stay in bed. The third rule is if you get out of bed, you will go back to bed immediately. Fourth rule is no one will snuggle, cuddle, pat, rub, talk, kiss or in any way contact you other than to put you back to bed (there are a few exceptions to this rule, but I'm not going into them now). Peanut finally went to sleep around 9:45.
Wednesday he went to daycare and took a two hour nap. Husband put him to bed and there were lots of tears on both sides. He eventually made it to bed and went to sleep around 9:30. Progress, little as it may be.
Today he woke up early and was very tired all morning. We went to the store to walk around and burn off some energy. He could barely make it through lunch. We went up shortly after that and read several books. He went to bed on his own and I kissed and hugged him and left. He sat up and talked for just a couple minutes, but then flopped down and went to sleep. He slept about an hour and a half, though I'm not entirely sure since I was asleep too.
Tonight he did well. We did the normal routine and even had special (Spider man) pajamas to wear. After reading the last book he wanted to read more, but I said no. I did agree to tell him a short one if he got in bed. He went to bed and I recited the shortest story I know, kissed and hugged him and left. He got out of bed several times, but I only had to stick my head in the room and he climbed back into bed. Soon enough he was out. As far as I can tell he was asleep by 8:15. I'm keeping my ears peeled because I just don't believe he could really be done this early. I'm hopeful, but realistic.
We don't yell, get frustrated, scream, spank, punch walls, kick things or anything else. We love him and put him to bed with love and then don't say a word. We'll see what happens.
Wednesday he went to daycare and took a two hour nap. Husband put him to bed and there were lots of tears on both sides. He eventually made it to bed and went to sleep around 9:30. Progress, little as it may be.
Today he woke up early and was very tired all morning. We went to the store to walk around and burn off some energy. He could barely make it through lunch. We went up shortly after that and read several books. He went to bed on his own and I kissed and hugged him and left. He sat up and talked for just a couple minutes, but then flopped down and went to sleep. He slept about an hour and a half, though I'm not entirely sure since I was asleep too.
Tonight he did well. We did the normal routine and even had special (Spider man) pajamas to wear. After reading the last book he wanted to read more, but I said no. I did agree to tell him a short one if he got in bed. He went to bed and I recited the shortest story I know, kissed and hugged him and left. He got out of bed several times, but I only had to stick my head in the room and he climbed back into bed. Soon enough he was out. As far as I can tell he was asleep by 8:15. I'm keeping my ears peeled because I just don't believe he could really be done this early. I'm hopeful, but realistic.
We don't yell, get frustrated, scream, spank, punch walls, kick things or anything else. We love him and put him to bed with love and then don't say a word. We'll see what happens.
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