Just how much stress can one human handle? Has anyone found out? I suppose it's relative. You could take X, while I can take Y. Pretty sure I'm getting close. My brain has too much information. Too much. What happens? Will I just explode? Do I have a breakdown?
I have kids. Three of them. Boys. We have a house, three cars, one cat and various scattered family members. So two of three kids are having issues, the cat is having issues, the house is having issues and the other family members are having issues. I'm not sure how many more issues I can handle.
It might be therapeutic to list everything out here, but I just don't want to. My brain is tired of going over everything. I've thought about it all and I've tried logic and still nothing. I've prayed about it and still, nothing. I'm not sure who to talk to. That might mean it's time for an actual therapist of some sort. Right? Pay someone to care about me and my issues. Sure, though to be honest, that's another issue, money.
Round and round it goes, hunh? Seems like maybe you die when the ride stops. Life is all about the ups and down. If there are no ups and downs, then there is no life. Is that how this works? I could use a more soothing ride.
So there is this thing called Enneagram. I think I'm a nine. Not sure, but it seems to fit OK. Nines like to zone out, bury their head in the sand. That seems right. I wish I were another number though. I wish maybe my flaw was working too hard or being more assertive. Those don't seem like bad qualities. Avoidance seems like a bad quality. Super. More issues.
