I asked for help. Finally I got tired of how things are and I asked a friend to point me in the right direction. She met with me and we talked and she pointed out a few things. At first I did not believe it. After thinking about it, though, it is all true. Seeing it now I think I can change it. I just hope it does not take years, but it will take time.
Who knew I was so messed up? I just thought it was everyone else. What is wrong with all of them? Now, I know it was me and they were never going to measure up to my ridiculous standards. They are not the problem. I am. Now I can get to work making some changes.